Whether you are just getting to know each other or have been together for years, there is always something new to learn about each other because both continue to grow and evolve. Oftentimes during the initial stages of romantic love, a great amount of concerted time and effort is allocated to each other which may include long phone conversations, many texts during the day and multiple dates throughout the week. It is as if there are not enough hours in the day to soak in all of the ‘wonderful-ness’ from the source of your adoration. During this time you listen intently to their stories, ignore your gadgets and are quick to respond to their communication because there are no amount of deadlines too great to keep you from at least acknowledging them and keeping him/her in the loop (ahhhh new love).
THEN…
However, for some couples this changes as time goes by. Listening intently is replaced with ‘multi-tasking’ listening. Multiple dates throughout the week are replaced with one date every few months. Multiple intimacy sessions throughout the week is significantly reduced. No longer is quality time spent with each other as lovers and friends, instead the relationship moved into ‘job’ mode, the business of running the house and raising the children (if applicable). Life becomes a routine:
- Wake up.
- Grab gadget and peruse social media or respond to work emails.
- Get dressed.
- Peck on the cheek.
- Drive to office.
- Work.
- Drive home.
- Spend an hour or so with kids (eat, bathe, read story, put to bed).
- Mini-chores.
- Perhaps continue office work at home.
- Take a shower.
- Get into bed.
- Grab gadget and peruse social media or respond to emails.
- Peck on cheek.
- Go to sleep.
- Repeat.
Where is the passion? Where is the excitement? Where are the two people who could not wait to see each other? Where is the couple, not the parents or business partners but the couple? Perhaps it is time to reintroduce yourself to each other. Whether one partner is traveling for business or you are just away from each other for work, try this activity. When something catches your attention, take a picture write a caption and send it to your significant other. This activity does the following:
Lets your partner know you are thinking of him/her.
Encourages you to become present and creative.
Brings your partner into your world.
Serves as a catalyst to rapport.
Everyone views the world differently and when we are given the opportunity to view the world through the eyes of another, compassion is often the outcome. Do something different. It is time to reconnect with your love…you two have been strangers for too long. – Misha N. Granado