It is healthy to mourn your loss but self-medicating with drugs, alcohol, sex (especially with your ex), shopping or engaging in unhealthy behavior such as stalking (in person or via technology) is not beneficial. Although these behaviors may provide a false sense of ‘relief’ in actuality you are only numbing your pain and delaying your healing. Once the ‘high’ fades, you are left with the original emotions coupled with any new ‘emotional wounds’ inflicted due to your coping strategy.
Allowing yourself to feel the pain is a part of the healing process.
No, it is not pleasant.
No, it is not easy.
Yes, it will take time.
Yes, you will feel again.
Yes, you will love again.
Yes, you will laugh again.
Yes, you can heal from ‘this.’
Yes, it will require new skills and tools.
But you will need to make a conscious choice to heal. You will need to fight for your life. You will need to embrace a new perspective. With a loss, it is normal and understandable to feel like giving up, to no longer show up, trust, believe or love again. It is normal to feel scared, angry, devastated, lost, confused and to even question God.
However, at Love Grows we encourage you not to get stuck there. You were brought to this world for a purpose and we need you, the world needs you. We need all of the wisdom you will have gained from going through ‘this.’ There is someone in the future who you will be able to help along their healing journey because you did your work, healed, gained new tools and insight. We are all connected.